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President George Bush is visiting an elementary school today and he visits one of the classes.They are in the middle of a discussion related to words and their meanings. The teacher asks the President if he would like to lead the class in the discussion of the word, "tragedy." So the illustrious leader asks the class for an example of a "tragedy." One little boy stands up and offers, "If my best friend, who lives next door, is playing in the street and a car comes along and runs him over, that would be a tragedy." "No," says Bush, "that would be an ACCIDENT." A little girl raises her hand: "If a school bus carrying 50 children drove off a cliff, killing everyone involved, that would be a tragedy." "I'm afraid not," explains Mr. President. "That's what we would call a GREAT LOSS." The room goes silent. No other children volunteer. President Bush searches the room. "Isn't there someone here who can give me an example of a tragedy?" Finally, way in the back of the room, a small boy raises his hand. In a quiet voice he says, "If Air Force One, carrying Mr. Bush, were struck by a missile and blown up to smithereens, by a terrorist like Osama bin Laden, that would be a tragedy." "Fantastic," exclaims Bush, "that's right. And can you tell me WHY that would be a TRAGEDY?" "Well," says the boy, "because it wouldn't be an accident, and it certainly wouldn't be a great loss."

An american men walked through hongkong. He was dursty an looked around for a beverage-shop. In a small corner he found a store with alcoholic beverages. Outside of this store there is an old chinese man sitting on a chair. The american asks for the price of a bottle of bourbon whiskey. Chinese man answers: just one hongkong dollar, sir. The american asks for 2 bottles and the chinese man answers: same price sir, one hongkong dollar. the american aksed again, why do you sell one bottle for the same price as for two bottles? Chinese man answers: upstair, there's my boss fucking my wife, I am downstairs and I am fucking his business.

What does a woman do while her husband jumps around in the garden? Answer: Keep on shooting!

Kirk: "Mr. Spock - Scan the romulan spaceship!" Spock: "OK, Sir - is 300 DPI good enough?"

A small turtle comes along on the forest ground. With incredible effort and tenacity it begins to climb the trunk of a large tree. After a very long time it reaches a limb and teeters on along it, then jumps off. It lands on its back where it remains for a while, stunned by its fall. Then it rightens itself and starts the procedure again. On a higher limg two birds are watching. After the turtle has jumped several times, one bird says: "Darling, don`t you thing it`s time to tell him he was adopted?"

A cowboy is riding across the plains of the old west, when he is captured by Indians. The tribe puts him on trial for crimes against the Indian Nation, and he is found guilty. "You have been sentenced to death," said the Chief, "but, as is our custom, you have three wishes to make as your last requests." The cowboy thought for a minute and said: "Well, for my first wish, I'll need my horse." "Give him his horse", said the Chief. The cowboy whispered something into the horse's ear, and the horse took off like a shot across the prairie. Twenty minutes later, the horse returned with a beautiful blonde woman on its back. The cowboy looked at this, shrugged his shoulders, and helped the young lady off the horse. He then took her into the woods and had his way with her. "Second wish", said the Chief. "I'll need my horse again", said the cowboy. "Give him his horse", said the Chief. Once again, the cowboy whispered into the horse's ear, and once again the horse rode off over the prairie. Thirty minutes later, the horse returned with a beautiful brunette on its back. The cowboy looked up and shrugged, helped the young lady off the horse, and went into the woods, same reason as before. "This is your last wish", said the Chief, "make it a good one!" "I'll need my horse again." "Give him his horse", said the Chief. The cowboy grabbed each side of the horse's head, and put his face right up to the horse's. "Listen good this time - I said POSSE!"

There were these two cows, chatting over the fence between their fields. The first cow said, "I tell you, this mad-cow-disease is really pretty scary. They say it is spreading fast; I heard it hit some cows down on the Johnson Farm." The other cow replies, "Heck, I ain't worried, it don't affect us ducks."

Love is a name, sex is a game. Forget the name and play the game.

One beautiful December evening Huan Cho and his girlfriend Jung Lee were sitting by the side of the ocean. It was a romantic full moon, when Huan Cho said .. "Hey baby, let's play Weeweechu." "Oh no, not now, let's look at the moon" said Jung Lee. "Oh, c'mon baby, let's you and I play Weeweechu. I love you and its the perfect time," Huan Cho Begged. "But I rather just hold your hand and watch the moon." "Please Jung Lee, just once play Weeweechu with me." Jung Lee looked at Huan Chi and said, "OK, we'll play Weeweechu." Huan Cho grabbed his guitar and they both sang..... "Weeweechu a merry Christmas, Weeweechu a merry Christmas, Weeweechu a merry Christmas, and a happy New Year."